Paranoia

I usually try not to allow television programmes affect me, especially if its mindless viewing like eTV's highly-revered soapie Rhythm City. But Peter SePuma's character in today's episode struck a chord within me. SePuma plays Miles Vilakazi, a music mogul who suffered a stroke after a car accident and wakes up to find his record company in the hands of his arch-enemy. The sudden realisation that his entire life's work is no more, offsets his paranoia.

You know, the saddest thing about the after effects that years of drugging have had on my brother is not only the fact that he is faced with the tremendous task of rebuilding his life, self-esteem and credibility but also that he has to deal with bouts of paranoia that have attempted to become ingrained in the fabric that is his life.

Sometimes I wonder if he is just acting because my brother is a pretty intelligent guy and a person like him couldn't possibly believe that half the stuff he tells me is true. Sometimes he'll tell me things like 'the reception on this phone is messed up because the people next door have put a bugging device in it'. Or that the government has technology which allows for people's phone conversations to be monitored. He'll wake up on some days and cover his curtains with black refuse bags because he doesn't want the spies to see inside his room.

Even though I wonder if this is all an act, I know that it is not because what kind of person would purposefully want to put himself or his family through that kind of stress? And besides, he's pretty normal when he's not being paranoid, so I doubt that this is some kind of pastime to him.

Miles Vilakazi believes that there are hidden cameras everywhere he goes and it made me sad to watch that because I remembered my brother. I wondered what goes on in the mind and heart of a person plagued with paranoia -I quietly asked the Lord to restore my brother's mind.

I believe that he will come full-circle. Not only will my brother's mind be restored but everything else that was lost or stolen from his life will also be restored one hundred fold. His life will be a testimony to all.